Curtain Call

Hey, guys! I'm just letting you know I don't think I'll be needing to use this blog anymore. Everything is fine now, so I don't need you guy to support me. It's enough to just have the love and companionship of everyone here in the Church! But, before I go, here's a parting gift that I made for you all the other day.

Please share it with your friends! I want everyone to know how happy I am and how happy they can be! In a world like this, all we can do is spread our love, right? And I've found love here, guys, so I won't be needing yours anymore! So long!

Sing-Along

Apparently they enjoyed my musical stylings at the jam session because I've been reassigned. Instead of studying in the community college, I'm going to be a teacher's assistant at the playschool (kindergarten in Yankspeak), helping teach the kids through the medium of song. Naturally, I've been learning a lot of the songs that the Church like to sing, which has actually helped me solve the mystery of my whispering neighbours; they've been singing these songs late at night, which I find really odd. What's even weirder is that I never see them entering or leaving the apartments. Are they locked up in there for their own protection or something? I'm afraid to ask in case it's something I'm not supposed to be wondering about.

I'm still trying to figure out what they're doing. I still have to attend the daily theology classes but they haven't gotten anymore persuasive, just...I've grown indifferent to them, I guess? The ideas are interesting enough, but I'm not convinced by them. The implications are interesting to think about but I'm not going to turn into one of them just from thinking about their beliefs. I'm not thinking like them, as far as I know.

Anyway, things are slow here, so I don't really have much to say. I'm quite tired and it's getting close to the time when the whispering usually starts, so I think I'm gonna try and get to bed before that starts. Talk to you all later!

Neighbours

I think my neighbours in the complex must be crazy or something. They keep waking me up in the middle of the night with their incessant whispering. I dunno if they're talking to someone or to themselves or just muttering like crazy people or what but it's getting very irritating.

As much as I obviously dislike being kept prisoner in some cult's compound, I have to admit the classes are kind of interesting. I was always an okay cook but I'm learning some good stuff in the college here, though I keep having problems with carpentry because the designs they get me to carve into the furniture I make keep giving me headaches when I look at them. It's weird, because I obviously start the designs somewhere, but after a while, they don't seem to have a beginning or end. And the wood we use is kind of weird too.

But I digress. I let slip in class that I play music the other day and now I've been invited to come to a jam session. And attendance is mandatory. So I have to todder off. Sorry about the gaps between updates, it keeps slipping my mind. I'll try and update again soon.

Uncertainty

It's been almost two weeks and still it doesn't seem like they've been doing anything to brainwash me. I don't get it. I can't tell if they're just not doing a very good job or if they're doing such a good job that I haven't even been able to notice or if they're deliberately acting this way for some subtler purpose.

I don't want to get too paranoid about in case I'm playing into their hands, but I don't want to be too relaxed about it either, for the same reason. I'm half-expecting something underhanded, like drugs hidden somewhere, but I prepare my own food (thank you, cookery classes), take care of my own apartment, do my own laundry, etc.

They have to be trying something. But what?

New School

I've been out of the hospital for four days now. They've put me in an apartment of my own in a little communal housing area, one of many within the compound. Even though I'm on my own, I know I'm being watched. It didn't take long to find at least some of the cameras, if not all.

Because I was discharged in the middle of last week, they let me have a long weekend to settle in, but today I started my "re-education". I'm young enough that they've put me in what they call the day school, analogous to what Americans would call a community college, I guess. We're given a selection of subjects to pick from - I chose computer programming, carpentry and cookery. All the subjects are things which can be used to contribute to the Church in some way. I just picked what looked vaguely interesting.

In addition to these electives, we're given a daily class in the theology of the Church. This is the brainwashing class, obviously. I'm not going to pollute the Internet by spreading their filth but, after the first day, I can't see how they expect to successfully indoctrinate me. Either they're far more subtle than they seem at first, or my treatment is going to get progressively more severe.

Time will tell, I guess.

Still Alive 3: Still Alivin'

I'm apologising in advance for any spelling mistakes, I'm still having co-ordination problems since what Royal did to me.

Obviously, I'm alive. I think I've demonstrated that well enough. No need to dwell on that point any longer.

I'm in a hospital somewhere. It's a small, private one owned by these Church people. My arm picked up an infection in Royal's shack despite the antibiotics, so I've got tubes and shit running out of me, here, there and everywhere, fixing up the damage and whatnot.

They say I'll be ready to leave soon and then my education can begin. They're letting me post because they want you guys to see how happy I'll become once they've integrated me into their flock.

I'm scared.

The Servant's Tale, Part 4

The fellow from the Church came yesterday and took Sufjan away. Poor chap wasn't really in a position to resist, what with being drugged halfway to hell and only have one hand. I gave his collector enough antibiotics and painkillers to keep him going for a few weeks but if he doesn't renew the prescription, Sufjan's going to have a rough time of it.

I've burned down the little shack where Sufjan and I spent this last week and a bit. No evidence, no proof. Just ashes, as it should be. Everywhere I go, I intend on leaving ashes, where I've set hopes, dreams, minds and bodies on fire.

It's been a pleasure speaking to you all. I don't know if this blog is ever going to be updated again. I don't really care. If it is, I can assure you that the only person writing here will be the twisted, broken husk of what was once Sufjan McBride. If what I'm saying is getting you hot-headed, then good. That's exactly what I want. If it's not, that's fine too. It will give me the motivation I need to work harder.

So long, friends. I've got a world to burn.